Why do married people feel when they have problems they need advice from other people? Instead of talking to ?

each other first?Why do married people feel when they have problems they need advice from other people? Instead of talking to ?
Because they need to know that when they feel drowning in a glass of water, they don't know that that is NORMAL.


Talking to other friends, help a lot. Also there are issues that only the couple can deal with.


Follow your advise, practice it. I hope that you never have to talk to friends and find out that all men and husbands, don't know if they are coming or going....is normal from them.


Believe me, after you know what the other girls go thru in their marriage, your husband will be the best!! compared to others...........


is even funny lots of times!!!Why do married people feel when they have problems they need advice from other people? Instead of talking to ?
Personally, I have been married for 21 years (April), and have not had to ask others for advice. We talk to each other every day, and if and when I need help with a problem we talk it out with each other. I do not mind if someone else ask me for an opinion about what I think, but I haven't had to ask for marital advice. You do know that there are people out there who need advice because they have tried to talk to their spouse, but for some reason, the spouse hasn't figured it out. I respect people who ask for help if they need it,and if for some unknown reason I needed help, I would ask family. You act like married couples that ask for advice or help are committing a crime or something. They just might not have any body to ask , but yahoo answers.
A mystery for sure. They will tell intimate details to complete strangers, yet hide things from each other. I think counselors sometime perpetuate bad habits husbands and wives get into--avoiding dealing with each other directly, and not facing up to the real issues. I know so many people who went to counselors who ended up worse after following unwise advice.
They do talk to each other first in most cases. But sometimes this communication breaks down, and people don't see it. Sometimes it takes a stranger's input to realize it. Sometimes people need to learn what is that needs to be communicated to their spouse. You know how some people think that crying is somehow supposed to make everything clear their spouse. This is when it helps to at least try to describe the situation to a stranger, just to be able to put it in words.





As for the situation with your brother in law, getting advise from parents is just not the same as getting an opinion from a stranger. Strangers have neither expectations nor vested interest in you. For example, if you were to tell a stranger you're quitting your job and going to Himlaya mountains to study emotional patters of mountain goats he'd probably say ';Oh yeah? Tell me more.'; And maybe after talking to him you'd get a better insight whether or not it's a good idea. Now, imagine you told the same thing at the dinner table with your parents. Your father drops his fork and stops chewing. Your mom starts crying without saying a word. Drama, emotions, no useful input.
because sometimes people need that outside take on things . sometimes they see things that ur spuose may not see or they have experienced things themselves and are open to helping others. i personally would ask someone who i may not know simply because i dont like my friends in my bussiness and its simple to ask a stranger a question and have them anaswer it and be done with it. i have got lots of answers on her from my marriage to my pregnancy.
in order for two people to sit down and talk to each other, they both have to willing to listen. when your partner is not willing to listen or constantly interrupts it's impossible to make any headway. that's probably why they run to their families, also they could be hoping for sympathy, and someone to take their side. one on one communication is best.......just my thoughts.
I like talking to other people, because it helps me put my thoughts and feelings into perspective. That way, when I do communicate to the other person about it. I have clear mind and I'm focused on specific issues more, where as before, my mind was all over the place.





It's also about getting an outside look in. Sometimes, we're blinded to what's really going on and we need someone from the outside to say, ';Well, I think you're missing the point'; or whatever.
Some married couples can not communicate with each other, but


actually that is the best way to solve problems in a marriage as me


and my wife communicate all the time and that is why we are still


together for 22yrs.
I think it says a lot about their relationship and why they have problems int he first place. If they can't talk to each other, then that probably has a lot to di with their problems.
Normally...it's not that they want advice...they are just venting. But at the same time I feel the problem would go away if you talk to the one you share the problem with.
maybe they have talked to their spouse over and over... nothing changes and getting feedback from other people who actually validate your feelings is nice for a change...
Very good question.
they should do both


a person not involved has an objective opinion that can help