Bf who's twice-divorced does not want to get married - help?? advice?

Me %26amp; my bf has been dating for a yr now, and altho I don't necessarily want to get married right away, I want to know where things are going and whether he intends marriage for us in the future. Whenever I bring up the topic of marriage, he is reluctant to talk about it.





As far as I know he is loyal %26amp; committed to me (all our friends know we're together, he gave me keys to his apartment, we have a pet together at his place). But the problem is because he had bad experience with his past 2 marriages, he doesn't want to marry again.





When I push the q, he will explain that he doesn't really want to get married a 3rd time. I would get very upset because I have never been married and look forward to it. He understand my p.o.v. too but he thinks he needs time. His divorce finalized last year but he's still paying spousal support.





I do believe we love each other. He is also open to cohabitation, just not marriage. What do you think I should do? Wait? Move on? Settle? Thanks~Bf who's twice-divorced does not want to get married - help?? advice?
Wait a little longer (another year max), but do NOT move in together. If you really want to get married, if you move in together it isn't going to happen. Not with his attitude concerning marriage. You can't have your cake and eat it too....you can't live like your married and not be married. Stand your ground on this issue.





example: him: ';Honey, why don't you move in with me?'; you: ';We aren't married. I won't live with a man who isn't my husband.'; him: ';You know how I feel about that.'; you: ';And you know how I feel too. If you want all of me, you have to be willing to make that commitment.';Bf who's twice-divorced does not want to get married - help?? advice?
Sweetie like you say above, ';But the problem is because he had bad experience with his past 2 marriages, he doesn't want to marry again.'; YOU can't fight this and make him change his mind. You knew this and unfortunately you do not have it in you to make him see he should cahnge his mind. You need to grab your heart and walk away and carry on. Getting a man to change his mind about marrying and children is a waste of time, especially if they have been there and done that. Don't take this personally it is him not you. Don't waste your years and go forward without him in your life...
he been twice bitten hurts probably got to pay out $ .


you got to be patient ..tell him you understand but you'd like a future with him as well you do not want to fell dangled in the future understand how you fell .wait if you love him --move on if in the future you can not handle the waiting ---settle for time if it is on your side -your well come --hope it helps
That piece of paper isn't any type of guaranttee, as you can see from his two divorces.


So relax and take things slowly. The important thing in relationships is that you take the other person's needs and wants into consideration, and marriage is not one of those things you want to be pushy on.


If you lived forever in happiness with him, would it matter if you never had that piece of paper?


You didn't say what your ages are, but if you are under 23 or so, why don't you wait on the cohabitation? You're young and there's no rush to complicate your life, and it's only been a year. You're too focused on this marriage idea!
do you really need to get married. is so ask your self why.


don't read statistic's on repeat failed marriages. you won't like what you read, statistically your chances aren't good.


can't blame the guy, but if its really really important to you he should do it.


They can be a lot of money and from his past he probably doesn't put a lot of weight or belief in the vows etc.
1. Move on if you want marriage. Can you blame him? He has been there, done that.





2. Wait, and wait, and wait, and wait....you'll be 89 and still shacking up!





3. Settle? That's what you are doing right now. You deserve someone who can give you more--you deserve so much more! This makes me the most sad of all for you.





Are you that interested in marriage? If you were, there's no way you would live with him (or anyone for that matter) with so little hope. Just be very honest with yourself, and don't finish any thoughts that end with the word ';But';. As in ';I know he said he doesn't want to get married a third time, but...'; Any justification is just denial on your part.





Sorry to be so blunt, but you did ask!
give him time n don't push the issue. he just got over a divorce. 1 year is too quick to marry someone, even more so when he just got out of one bad relationship. he just wants to make sure he does it right the next time