So, I'm having an affair with a married woman. Advice? lol...?

Now, first and foremost this is a completely honest and serious question. I am not facilitating any sort of lie, I'm just asking for different opinions.





First of all, the woman in question was my long term girlfriend for roughly 3 years. We lost contact for about 7 years, than met back up on Myspace. She ended up taking a trip to New York which is where here and I both grew up. We spent a massive amount of time together.





We ended up sharing several intimate moments, that needless to say, were spectacular. We completely fell in love all over again, spending nearly every waking moment of her two week trip together. Sadly, she had to return home back to her husband.





We talk secretly amongst each other, sinfully desiring to be back with one another. She wants to leave her husband and be with me.





Now I have to admit, I feel quite guilty at times. She's married and theres kids in the picture. However, at the same time...it feels so damm right holding her in my arms again. Advice?So, I'm having an affair with a married woman. Advice? lol...?
Hate to sound so - - ';Pure'; in thought, because I'm not! But, been there, done that. If she ends it with her husband, that would be the best for all involved. Until she does, you should maintain an arms distance. If you don't, the one thing for sure is; your going to get hurt and give hurt!So, I'm having an affair with a married woman. Advice? lol...?
if you love her just try to forget about her cause what if you were the husband you love her but when yo love someone you have to think aboutthem fist than you
Leave her alone. You have no right to mess with another man's woman nor does she have any being married. Especially with kids. Does no one take marriage vows serious anymore?!!? It may have been passionate for 2 weeks but when reality sets in (should you decide to move forward with the relationship), neither of you will trust each other and you'll realize that it was better off leaving the past just that...the past.
leave her alone. she's married. she did it to him and she'll do ut to you. she probably has other guys out there too.
Bottom line....she's married. She needs to resolve that one way or the other before beginning something else. You should really stay out of it until if/when she's free to date again. Tell her you care about her and always will, but she needs to figure out her marriage and until then, you can't see her. And then stick to it. Don't see her or have sexy phone conversations with her as long as she's with her husband. You'll only get hurt.





I wonder if it would have been that magical for her if she was single. Believe me, there's lots going on in that house that you don't know about. And only they can figure out what to do about it.





Good luck and be strong.
Stop what you are doing and move away if necessary in order to stop...kids aren't just ';in the picture';, you're screwing around with their lives in an irresponsible way.
Do you think she would have divorced her husband if you hadn't come along? If the answer is no then cut the ties. You are the one who will get all the pain. She has much to much to lose and you will will get nothing but a woman who will have really pissed off kids, and will do nothing but make your life miserable. If she gets the husband to take the kids, then you will have a miserable woman who misses her kids AND will be paying masses amount of child support and you will still end up with pissed off kids. You do what you want to do, but know that there is an extreme amount of pain in your future if you proceed. Do this the right way.
END ALL CONTACT IMMEDIATELY.





It may feel good temporarily, but it will cause problems for you in the long run that will just not be worth it. It will be very difficult for you to end contact, but it will be even more difficult later on if you don't.
This is how people get hurt and I mean physically hurt. Should the husband find out he might come looking for you. Better find out if he owns any guns!!
You have already crossed lines you absolutely should not have. While I do have some empathy for the fact that the two of you share a history, it appears you did break up and there had to be a reason for that. Many times when couples 're-connect', there is a honeymoon period when they remember all the good times and the closeness they once had and it is so awesome. In this scenario though, it's not just a re-match -- she's cheating on her husband and presumably the father of her children. That's bad, really bad. If you have reconnected with an old love that is not free, it is incumbent upon you both to decide if you are going to work toward becoming a couple again -- BUT, until and unless the partner who is already attached gets a divorce, you must not see each other or communicate anymore. PERIOD! If you two were truly meant to be together, she will go home to her husband and ask for a divorce and get her life cleaned up before engaging in this cheat-job with you. You know what you did was wrong -- it was wrong for you to communicate with her on myspace once you realized the two of you still had a 'thing' and you both totally stepped out of line when you made it possible for you to get together and took it to the next level. If she is unhappy with her husband, SHE needs to fix that situation before she comes to you! The only time it will feel ';SO DAMN RIGHT'; is under cover of darkness, hiding like the cheats you are being. I'm sorry if that's harsh, but you know it's wrong. You should never live in a bad marriage---but you should always get out of the marriage BEFORE you start something else. It's wrong to wait to leave a bad marriage until you have another sure thing waiting in the wings. Don't be her dirty little secret!
This is a completely honest and serious answer.





Buy body armor.





A buddy of mine in an eerily similar situation took a shotgun blast in the chest. Fortunately he had is vest still on and was far enough away that he didn't get killed.
Why is your question in the government section? I think you want the family and relationships section. Personally, I like having sexual relationships with married women for the simple reason that they don't want or expect any commitment... usually. I've met a few that were psychos. It sounds like you're asking if it's OK to break up a marriage. The kids probably like both their parents and want them to be together, so you're probably not being fair to them if the two of you want more than an occaissional roll in the hay. If you keep it simple and secret it can't do much harm (except to yourself if you're in love with her). If you want more, you're being a bit selfish. The two of you had a chance for a life together years ago. You didn't take it. My advice would be to find another girl if you want to share your future with a woman. But if it's just sex, and you don't get too emotional about it, go ahead and enjoy. I would.
OooooooooooooooooooH, toughie! Depends whether you're a gent or a rascal, sir. A gent would let her get on with her life bringing up her children, with minimum disruption. A Rascal would tell her how he felt and hope that she flew back into his arms (kids in tow of course).


Me? I'd do the au pair!
another fool hits the dust
What about her family and kids? Do you feel right for them too?
Why don't you ask for advice from the person that could give you the best answer, her husband. What no cajones? Real men don't screw other man's wife. Better yet....you might just win the prize....an woman who would screw another man at the drop of a phone call.....
Did you attend the ';bill clinton school of ethics'; by any chance? you're both dogs..i feel real bad for her husband and kids.
As a Husband that was cheated on myself by my wife. I swore I would never put another man threw what I went threw. You are willing to destroy a family for your sexual needs you should feel guilty because Mr. You are a piece of SH*T !!!! I'm sure the three kids that have there life's sent into a tail spin because of you will agree. You aren't in the league of Child molesters being the lowest form of life but you are Damn close.
end it


do the right thing


if she really wants to be with you, she will end her commitment first and then come to you and do it the right way


end it now


if she's a cheater now, will you ever be able to trust her?


end it
With the girl comes the kids. Are you ready to take on that responsibilty or are you just lookin for a piece of ... ...anyways, the grass is not always greener on the other side...you may just be wanting her because she's ';unavailable';... How would you feel it she wasnt married, would the feelings still be there?
It is true everything while on vacation is intensified...


Then back to you no what....


You will have memories which also will change.


On a daily basis you have no idea what she is like.


Lust is a *****...
For the sake of her kids, I'd club you to death myself, but then if she's ready to leave them they probably deserve better.
Well id walk away however you should let it as her decision, while not feeling guilty yourself as her choice is just that.
drop the relationship NOW. there is only diseaster in the future for both of you. you stated that you feel guilty at timies listen to your gut reaction and not to your heart. you will regret this in the long term. i know i have been there.
End this immediately. If she cheats FOR you, what makes you think she won't cheat ON you later? Serious relationships should not be based on ';feels right'; emotions, but commitments. Evidently she is incapable of keeping true to a commitment.
You better be sure about what you are doing. Having an affair is exciting because it's 'taboo'. However, things might change if she is living with you and you are caring for her kids. The excitement runs out of the relationship pretty fast. Sometimes, the best thing to do is just to let your affair run its course.