Need advice. married 17 years and husband is going out more and more....?

I've been married 17 years and have learned to respect my husband's time. He plays tennis every Saturday morning for three hours while I trek the kids all over town to sports, scouts, etc. He goes away for a guys week once a year skiing, and rides his bike in good weather every other Sunday with friends. He hits the gynm daily for an hour while I do all of the homework with the kids and now he mentioned that he and his friends would be going out once a month on a Friday night. I had a problenm with that. He called me selfish. Hmmm..... Am I off base here or is he the slefish one?Need advice. married 17 years and husband is going out more and more....?
off base. hes entitled to still have a life outside of the marriage just like u r. personally i dont see anything wrong w/ it...he keeps in shape, plays tennis and rides a bike, goes out one night every month and goes on one week trip in YEAR...so what if he wants some time to him? it will benefit ur marriage in the end. every one needs there own space and a life outside of there marriage. as long as its innocent and theres no signs of cheating than i dont see anything wrongNeed advice. married 17 years and husband is going out more and more....?
as a wife and as a mom u've did best part of u... try ur best to move alone without ur husband's hand .. if one fine day, u think u cant move further then get a hand from ur husband.. he so active in other else.. if u ask u to stop me his current activities he might go for other useless stuffs..so betta let him lead his time.. and u re not selfish :)
No he is being the selfish one. You deserve sometime too. When do you ever get a chance for just the two or you or for you to be by yourself without the kids? Sounds like he doesn't have any desires to be with his family. Like he is sowing his oats.
Swear I know this one. Start making him want to be home. And buy the ';proper care and feeding husbands';. I know we all want to throw up at reality. But bottom line. Take care of your husband and he will adore you. Didn't work for my situation, because he and I are outside of the normal relationship for this type of book. But maybe it would help you. Geez I will send you my copy. He is lonely, he is out with the buds and friends that make him feel good, and appreciated, and handsome and lovable. Make it a pretty picture and he will respond.
Tell him you want him to match the time you spent with the kids. And that you want to match the time he spends with his friends with yourse. See how that goes over.
You need to remind him of what you have to offer. While your children are important, he probably thinks that is all you are concerned about. He may not think you are as attracted or interested in him as you once were. Especially if your main life revolves around your kids. You need to spice up your love life to remind him of the awesome woman you are. Let me know if you need some help with that ; )
WOW. hes the selfish one! it seems like youre doing EVERYTHING. kids, work, etc. he needs to relax and take care of the family - raise money. he cant leave you just to have 'fun' you need to have fun yourself! take charge, let him stay with the kids for once. go hangout with your friends! treat yourself to a spa :)
you are far from selfish you can do better i know how you feel i just kicked my husband to the curb if all he dose is take and take until theres nothing left for you to give then what do you have to give nothing so then he will find someone else to take from. i mean really what are you getting out of this marriage? i hate men that always say i want. they sound worse then my kids but the sad thing is the man gets what he wants and me and the kids get left out. there are more important things than material things kids need there dad to spend time with them. oh and hes selfish.
How long has he been doing this? By ';this';, I mean putting his wants over his family's needs. Is he having some sort of mid-life crisis, or is this the pattern he's had throughout the marriage?


It sounds like he has entitlement issues; that sort of issue is difficult to change without some counseling.